There's a fine line between being confident and being overly confident.
I suffered with a lack of confidence when i was younger, i thought other's knew better, who was interested in what i had to say, took more notice of other people's achievements and measured myself up against them. Even silly things like people might like me more if i had curlier hair, my smile was different, i wore different clothes, even thought if my parents decorated the house in a different colour or style, the list goes on and on. Those things were a big thing to me when i was younger in my early teens, and my self esteem was low, even though my parents owned their own home, i wanted for nothing within reason, I still felt i didn't match up to others and my expectations of myself were high and when i failed, my confidence and esteem would slide further down. I tried many things over the years and couldn't see my successes, i'd had a saturday job at 14, went straight into full time work, had a good circle of friends, parents that loved me and a nice home.
Every now and again i'd tell myself it only mattered to me how i was, i didn't realise i was the only one bothered by me "thoughts" and "how i should be"
It took me a long time to realise that, as i picked myself up trying to better myself, people around me seemed to change and pull away. I didn't realise like drew like, so when i was feeling negative about myself i'd be attracting people with the same thoughts and as i tried to better myself i was always pulling myself back over as it felt comfortable. I had family members say i'd changed and i wasn't their sort anymore, i was fine with that and still am, as i've found there's always a positive outcome for everyone involved when there's a break.
From a young age, i read magazine's, watched tv shows and read books on confidence and esteem, i've found through trial and error that not everything will work for everyone, but here's some tips that do work
I Hope these tips help you if you struggle with low self esteem or lack of confidence.
I welcome any comments or feedback and be grateful if you could share to help others.
A rainbow appears shortly after a storm, rainbow babies are healthy babies born shortly after a miscarriage, stillbirth or a loss of a baby. Something beautiful coming out of something not so good, symbolizing hope.
Rainbow babies are sometimes called miracle babies, because they bring a lot of healing to parents after a recent loss but also some guilt before the healing takes place.
All babies are blessings and losing a baby can cause a lot of upset, depending on a few factors like, length of pregnancy, if you know you're actually pregnant or not etc. How a woman deals with her emotions at that time can be hard. It's important to grieve and allow the loss to process in your mind as you might find it's harder to feel the excitement a new baby brings
I've been regressed twice and both times helped me immensely, these are my thoughts on it.
I was regressed as i thought it might help me understand myself and it did. Whether i've actually lived those 2 lives or because i'm human and my brain has tried to make sense in a way i would understand i really don't know.
I do know from regression i understood myself more than i did before, and in some ways helped with my mediumship as i understood myself, for example, i could understand the reasons behind my thinking, see why illnesses appear, understand why i am how i am and who i am.
It did release a lot of emotions and the first time i was regressed i did cry throughout the experience but felt better afterwards.
You should never go through a passing in regression and to me, whether thats an actual past life passing or again, my brain making sense of a traumatic experience without me actually remembering that experience i don't know.
The 2 people that regressed me were for me amazing and i could definately say there was no planting seeds in my mind or suggestive thoughts that might have led me to think or feel the way i did, they asked questions like "what year is it" "what clothes was i wearing" , "did i work" and "did i recognise the area" etc and questions along those lines, so nothing that could lead me. In the first regression i was a male in Kentucky in the mid 1800's (I've never been to Kentucky or America), in the second regression again i was a male in London's east end in the late 1800's (i've been to London once, for 2 days to windsor castle and the millenium dome, so definately not the east end of London)
It does involve a hypnosis, which not everyone can be hypnotised, but if you are going to be regressed look into it carefully as there are a lot of people that say it takes hours and many times, but in my opinion it doesn't, it takes approx 20/30 mins as you can't stay "under" for too long, and don't let anyone feed you seeds of suggestions let your own thoughts come through.
It means different things to different people, to me it means reflecting on the not so good memories that can overwhelm us because we still carry a mixed bag of emotions. As each emotion opens or we go deeper into our memories, perhaps specific situations, times or to do with certain people and we feel the emotion, a lot of us close the door but in fact, we should be opening the door as much as we can bear and as we do, confront our emotions and allow them to come through but start to look at the not so good memory in a different way to allow the healing to take place, which then allows ourselves to rid ourselves of the hurt or pain we feel. As we contemplate or rethink our emotions we're opening up the possibilities of changing our understanding, maybe seeing things in a different way and understanding reasons, heightened emotions and others thinking and we therefore can rationalise things that decrase pain we hold. It may take a few days or longer to deal with each step forward or opening that door more, but at each step our own healing takes place to move us forward to a new understanding of our own reactions. Maybe we blame ourselves too much instead of proportioning blame or maybe we blame others instead of taking blame ourselves when in fact the reality is, once you contemplate and rethink things turning them this way and that, you might actually find there's no blame just reactions which can become distorted and we can sometimes cause our own emotional distress which we hold onto. Our minds are the strongest muscle we have and at times can cause a vicious circle of reactions which can be easy to fall into. For some people, carrying a burden or issue since childhood can start to weigh heavy as we bury it with other issues due to the original issue and so on and so on, then they get so far buried it can be so hard to uravel or they feel so worn down it can feel like too much of an effort so they don't deal with it and carry on burying.
When opening the door to look within ourselves can be hard, a lot of people feel emotionally drained which can make us feel physically tired. It's scientifically proven our body stores emotional scars which can weigh us down and cause illnesses, I'm not saying you'll become illness free as you look within, but you will feel better and illnesses may start to relieve.
If there are emotional issues you can't face fully, the best thing you can do is not lay blame, but forgive yourself or the situation if you can't forgive a person and accept whatever happened was your only route or way of coping at that time.
When a weight is lifted you feel a release and actually do feel better for it, the secret is not allowing yourself to slip back down again but keep going.
Looking within also means looking at your flaws and weaknesses and working on those, maybe looking at yourself through someone else's eyes. We never see ourself as other's see us, have you been selfish lately, maybe too wrapped in yourself to notice what's going on with others? Have you noticed friends seeming to back off for seemingly no reason? try taking a moment to look within and look at your actions, behaviour etc
Spiritual growth as a person starts within.
Nearly 11 years ago i lost my husband and due to horrific accusations that i wouldn't subject anyone to, i spent a time in a suicidal, depressed state, seen councellors and everything that goes with it, cutting people off etc for a long time. Then the thoughts kept coming in and i started to reflect, turning everything round and understanding how those ex family members could make accusations, with the help of a fantastic councellor i started to look within and realised that they were trying to transfer what they had done, thought or felt guilty about over onto me to ease their own feelings but they still carry those emotions. Though i still can't forgive them i have forgiven the situation and myself and accepted my choices were the best i could make in the situation. I really did feel a weight lift from me and started to see things in a clearer way. The councellor suggested i write all my thoughts and events at that time down, which i did over a few years as i opened up the emotions. It was then suggested i turn it into a book which i have been writing or putting it into order i should say. As yet my book remains unpublished and without a title as i still continue to look within on a daily basis and add to it, also checking things legally.
I'm hoping to have it published by the end of 2019/2020.
The difference between someone who's been developed and someone undeveloped is very significant. When your developed you will have a better understanding of how you receive communications via your psychic senses and also which senses your working with, if undeveloped you won't understand as much and you may even misunderstand and miss some of the communication or if you misunderstand you may give the total wrong information. Also if undeveloped you may mistakenly claim to be a medium when really working psychically.
personal development is also an integral part of becoming a "better you" or opening to spirit
So for me, development is important for mediums, psychics and all lightworkers.
Peter Somerville, gone but not forgotten xx
23/9/55 - 02/08/2008
My thoughts on this have differed over the years. When our loved ones pass over to the spirit side they are able to contact us straight away IF the conditions are right. If there is so much grief that we think we want to only hear certain things, when we don't get to hear what we think we want to hear or we dismiss the evidence they give, then we normally think they havn't been in touch. I've realised this is just ourselves that's closed off a bit? it's usually because it's the actual physical person we are missing and probably not in the right frame of mind to accept the physical has gone. It's hard but when we are ready for someone to pass, either we don't want to see them in pain any longer or they don't have the energy to stay and we can see it's their time. It doesn't mean we don't grieve, it means we're ready to let them go and be in peace and pain free knowing it's out of love, it's putting that person first. When my husband Peter passed, i didn't want him to obviously, the same as anyone, but i was ready and prepared for his passing and accepted nothing, no amount of praying, sending out thoughts, new treatment, meds etc was going to make that difference. I rang at 9.30pm nightly to the hospice to speak to him, say goodnight from me and our kids and tell him how much we loved him. The night he passed 2/8/2008 i'd fell asleep and missed calling him, at 1.22am i felt as though i was shook by the shoulder and i woke up, reached for the phone and something instinctively told me i wasn't going to get an answer, i felt the love from him and heard him say "I love you and the kids, tell them and look after them" . He'd came to me as he took his transition, he passed at 1.25am..my kids obviously took it really hard and i had to be strong for them, the most heartbreaking thing in my life was to tell my kids their dad had passed and they wouldn't be able to see him, touch him or talk to him again, but he left signs all over for them. My daughter would wake up to find feathers on her pillow (not feather pillows) in her books, amongst toys and special songs would play, my son would get feathers or he'd want to go somewhere and miraculously he'd get opportunities and he'd smell his dad too. It's nearly 11 years and he still gives us signs he's about. Our loved ones are always drawn where there's love and there's lots here for him!
On the other side of things, i've known people lose someone and want them through so much,it's took a long time in some cases years for them to know they've been through but hadn't been ready to accept them as the grief has been so overwhelming and they've not been ready to let go.
Before you think letting go means forgetting someone, it definately doesn't, it simply means your ready to let go of the hurt. Grief is love with nowhere to go, it comes out in tears and many ways. And grief definately comes in stages, not many people like to admit but anger at the person that passed is one of the stages, and how you overcome it depends on yourself.