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  • Mentorship 2021

Spiritual declutter

3/15/2021

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Meditation is a way of bringing clarity, focus and peace to your mind, but...clearing out your cupboards or home is just as effective! 
Long lost belongings, clothes or keepsakes that you keep in boxes in an attic or tucked away in a drawer or cupboard can keep you attached to forgotten memories, people or times we don't want to think about for many reasons. Clearing these help to clear yourself of the attachments to these times, emotions or let go of people. 
As we declutter we face our attachments with compassion we are driven by consuming emotions, these are emotions that we pour our energy into that don't give us anything back but, they consume and drain us....whether you realise it they also block you from energies such as love, joy, courage, grace, peace, generosity. 
​As you declutter you transform.
Time to tidy
When you decide it's time to tidy, when you feel ready to clear out the old take notice of your feelings, listen to your internal self and just sit with that feeling, have a conversation with yourself about the emotions or feelings that have been raised. When strong emotions and make you question do you have the strength to go ahead, it's time to take a break.
Decluttering is ultimately self-care and if you aren't practising self-care as you do it then it is not a self-care activity.
Intend
As you clear the clutter set your intention for each room, for example a bedroom you might intend that space for relaxation love or joy, a bathroom may be intended for rejuvenation, cleansing and purifying.
Clear the energy
In each space clear the items that don't resonate with the energies you intend for that space, for example old letters or gifts from an ex love might hold the energies of regret, resentment and a form of bitterness which will prevent the flow of love into your bedroom. Bills might make you feel anxious. 
To spiritually cleanse a room we have to meet the things that are causing our spiritual energy to drain and instead intend the energy that allows our spiritual life to flourish.
Removing blockages
So you've set the intention in your bedroom now how do you do that with clothes or your sock draw??
if you open your drawer and theres something there that makes you go urghh! it's stopping that full flow of love and balance in that room. if it's an item that is well past being well worn or well used, but you think 'i paid good money for that!'  its creating a feeling of guilt which is again slowing down or stopping the flow of love and needs to be cleared.
Compassionate clearing
There are items we keep like old photos, a gift a child has made or a gift from a deceased loved one like a parent, when we come across these we open up the feelings and emotions that can stop us in our tracks. These can still make us feel drained that just holding at it or looking at it makes us want to collapse, and you put it back in the drawer. This shows an attachment to that object, whether it's regret, sadness, worry or a fear. This is where compassion comes in, because its compassion as a spiritual energy that transforms suffering. 
We have to learn to sit with compassion for ourselves, for the object and the story that brings those emotions forward.
Piles of regret
"That still needs doing" do you hear yourself saying this?  paperwork can be a minefield to go through but can be sorted into 'guilt' 'regret' 'anxiety' piles. Old medical records from 10 years ago might bring up guilt or regret and isn't worthy of the space in your head it takes up. 
You don't need to be carrying that physical, emotional and spiritual weight.
Sort the remaining papers out, this might not give you joy but it will give you access to what you need, not feeling afraid or anxious about looking into those files  because you don't know if you'll find what your looking for (or what else you might find!?)  
That's freedom and thats what you're aiming for. to be able to lay your hands on what we need as well as what we love.
Collections
Whether its candles, lipsticks, cookbooks or anything else, collections are likely to show your buying habits when your in psychic pain or in a difficult position emotionally.
Once you go through decluttering and see how your purchasing power has been driven by your pain, hopefully you can deals with those habits by recognising and they will change.
Letting go
Spiritual decluttering is an opportunity to practise letting go of things that no longer serve us (or never did)
Letting go doesnt have to be painful, it can be an act of grace or gratitude.
Pick up an object as if it were an old friend, thank it, forgive it if it never served you then let it go.
Clutter will show up again but it will become easier to see and take care of quickly.
Like a gardener, you'll have learned the difference between weeds and cultivated plants.
Remember
Decluttering is less an activity with a start and a finish, more a way of life.

Tips for a pain-free clear out

  1. Find a friend, you can declutter alone but it's easier with support
  2. make an appointment with yourself and stick with it, but take things slowly. This isn't like ripping of a plaster! start small and don't expect to get it all done in one go.
  3. Be gentle with yourself. having a lot of clutter doesn't make you a 'slob'  there's always a reason why we cushioned ourselves with piles of possessions, it's often linked to a loss (not always a death)
  4. Picture what you want to achieve. A peaceful calm home where you can live and thrive? Greater clarity and more space? To feel good coming home? Or just to be able to walk up the stairs without falling over obstacles?  Really picture what you want to achieve and hold that vision in your mind. Whats stopping you from achieving it? How did it get to this point? 
  5. Find other strategies. Are you hanging onto books so you can look up certain information? Is that information online? How much is the book to rebuy on kindle or paperback if you ever did really want to read it?  If you like the feel of physical books, set a number of shelves and do 'one in, one out' as you sort through them. 
  6. Ask yourself what each object is giving you. Objects are often tied to memories, have one box of treasured sentimental items, recognising why you want to keep them and who or what they remind you of. Whether this is a shoebox or a very large box will depend on the space you have or the size of your home.
  7. Feel guilty about waste? recycle or donate wherever you possibly can.
  8. ​Hidden clutter stuffed in wardrobes, drawers or anywhere else you can hide stuff, still feels like a burden. Clutter outside the mind is directly related to clutter inside the mind. Make space and allow Divine energy in!​

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Psyche & Soma balance

3/7/2021

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Do you live to work or work to live?
​We have to do it to pay our bills, put a roof over our heads, food on the table and have a luxury like new clothes, jewellry or a holiday! 
On average we work approx 40 hours per week with some professionals doing more, we have mounting pressure to keep our jobs by increasing our efforts. Work can be very stressful and actually fills the majority of our waking time.
We live to work
But...how many of us work to live and actually achieve that work~life balance? 
This can be a very difficult task to undertake and accomplish.
The stress of work can actually seriously contribute to mental health and physiological conditions.
It has long been recognised by the spiritual community that the mind influences the body. 
Our lifestyles are slowly killing us with stress and we are truly out of balance. There is a need to rediscover the balance and bring harmony between mond, body and soul. 
Medical science has caught up and have recognised the valuable concept of 'psyche and soma' which literally means mind and body.
Over the years some philosophers have interpreted the psyche to not only mean the mind or conciousness but also the soul. 
In 1964 George Freeman Solomon wrote of the 'emotions, immunity and disease' and first made aware the medical link between the immune system and emotions which studies followed. 
Ancient philosophers such as Plato and Hippocrates believed a good balance between the psyche and the soma resulted in good health whilst imbalance created ill health. 
So that need for balance has always been there as a belief system to some.
Pressure that some women feel to become pregnant can result in phantom pregnancies, shell shocked soldiers have developed physical illnesses that have been linked to the horrors they witnessed in battle. 
Modern medical research has discovered there is a two way communication between the mind and the body.
Our thoughts create a physical response in our bodies.
By altering our breathing we can actually change the feelings of pain. In the early 1990's it was found that cancer patients who controlled their anger or grief did not recover as well as those who expressed their emotions. 
Those of us who are of the spiritual nature or working in the world of spiritualism, know how emotions, specially negative ones being kept in can affect us and our abilities.
​We are a being of soul and mind encased in a physical body, it's important that we take care of every aspect of this divine trinity and treat them as 'the holy three' 
​
HOW?
It begins with finding that work-life balance in our life. If we are happy in our jobs we are healthier in ourselves. If we unhappy at work we take time off then feel guilty about it which then adds to our ill health. 
It has been known that at the start of an annual holiday from work, you can become sick due to the mind and body relaxing and suddenly feeling tired and drained. 
if working lives do not change there is a danger of autoimmune diseases and physical conditions creeping in to become the pague of the young and old as we bow down to stress. Why? Because we are out of balance and have created a society which ignores the soul.
Symptoms of autoimmune illnesses can range from fatigue, fever, joint pain and more. These diseases happen when the bodies own immune system attacks and destroys healthy body tissue, essentially we are killing ourselves.
In times of stress; bereavement, divorce, loss of a job, our immune defences are low and we develop all types of illnesses from depression, aches, breaking out in sores to many others. The psychosomatic effects on our lives can be phenomenal.
Finding that balance between work and life is important by seeking to unite mind and body with a healthy diet and lifestyle before the effects of imbalance take their toll.
​if we are to be truly healthy and completely balanced then we must also have a balanced spiritual life too. When we have faith we are strong, as we feel and know we are not alone on our journey. 

MEDIUMSHIP
Bringing the balance into emotions by releasing what is no benefit or which is holding you back, actually boosts your psychic abilities and can move you over to the mediumistic from the psychic. 

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Do we always know where love is?

10/27/2020

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Do we always feel love or see it when it hits us in the face? How many times have you only noticed when it doesn't seem to be there?
Here are a few words i was inspired to write about love being like water...
Love pours out or can dry up, it can shape, mould and define us. How many times through our lives do we change things when we feel we're stagnating? It can be something we love doing, people we love the company of or in relationships.
Water is the same, water can become stale or stagnant  and what do we do then? Some people add more water to refresh and add a bit  more body  or life to it, some people change the water completely not giving the stale stagnating a chance...love is the same. in relationships, whether a romantic, friend or yourself relationship, we can feel stale or stagnant if we don't see it going anywhere, some people put effort into the love they share or freshen it up by taking time to share with others, and some people end relationships cutting everything off...very much like water.
When love flows we feel happy, it's not challenging, its not negative but it's peaceful when everything goes smooth....
water flows down a river and an ocean is so inviting when the weather's calm and the sun is shining, everything is peaceful and tranquil. When the weather changes and there's a storm or rocks in a river, water crashes and bangs and is rough through a storm, anyone out in boats or out beside the water pray and hope the storm passes and they make it through. 
Love is the same, there's hard times and experiences we all go through that can challenge us and try to break us.  
We do the same as those out in water at rough times, we hope and pray to get through it and learn from that experience, just like on the water they prepare better for the next time.
Love should be unconditional and always there, maybe not always be able to see it but we might hear it in kind words or actions. Just like love, water is always there, whether you know it or not. Walk along any street or town centre and you might think your miles from water but...water runs through pipes under the sidewalks and walkways....
Sometimes we are surprised by where we are shown love. You might not feel it or see it, but it might be just one smile from someone or a selfless act someone will do for you and you feel a glimmer of something but you can't put a finger on it. 
How many of us have gone through times when we felt totally abandoned by love and left feeling empty, devoid of any feelings of love wondering when it's going to come along again? when will someone show love by saying or doing something nice?
It's like being in a desert, no signs of water
When the conditions are right, we get further through that hard time and we are ready...we see love has been there all the time.
So what is love? 
​It's always there, unseen, unheard but always in the background.


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What is God all about?

8/31/2020

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Do you struggle with the term God? Think of an old man sitting behind the pearly gates? maybe it makes you think of religion and you had enough of that at school or maybe too much of the use of the word God? 
I know how you feel....I've spoke to a lot of people lately who have those thoughts and more. As i was growing up i associated the word God with religion and conformity, i'd hear people say "God is watching you" and i associated it with a "fear" which is what a lot of people do without realising. I also couldn't get my head around "him" watching but i could never see "him" 
At school and still, i enjoy religious studies, learning about different religions and how a faith can unite and reunite people, all diversities but seperate beliefs, only a slight difference in some cases but a difference all the same. All have spirituality running through them, but also a dogma which a lot of us hold onto and others push it away. Which is where usually, the reluctance to accept God or even understand God comes in. 
In my thoughts, i feel it's because some of us aren't ready to love ourselves or be open to our emotional side, the positive love side of us.
A man in a flowing gown has never sat with me, because how could it be a man or a human form if "God " had never been in physical form? So it didn't make sense to me, what does sit with me is this, God is an energy, a creative force that flows and as energy is never ending so is the flow of God. As energy has no boundaries unless harnessed so is God, an abundance of limitless boundaries. Because God is seen as a faith, hope and a trust, a creative force which is a positive, God is ultimately love which is the purest form of emotion. 
I went through periods of not liking myself for whatever reason, i let the negative thoughts in, saw my flaws or what percieved were my flaws based on what other people had to say went on  on the self sabotage and had a pity party..."why me?"  "things went wrong because of something i did" and i ended up doing the "falling out with God" if there was a God why would these things happen, if there was a God why would he give me more misery, if there was a gOd why would he take people out my life, I became a negative person and envious towards other's who i percieved to have what i'd had. I was thinking with my  lower self which is the jealousy, bitterness, envy  and all the negative traits that are in us all and and maybe even think religion doesn't fit right, which it might not but only when you don't realise that religion is simply a belief and it can all be changed.
Thinking of God as seperate to religion for those who religion doesn't sit right , God is love which is in us all. The creative driving force which propels us on a daily basis to strive for better, be good people, be nice to our loved ones, those closest to us, but also to smile at strangers we pass in the street, think good thoughts when we hear of good deeds. This is the higher self, the God spark that fills us with love, confidence, boosts our self esteem, happiness and all the positive traits.
God is hope.
Religion is the belief in a controlling power which God is or can be for many,  a trust, a way of life, a thought process. 
As a child at school i had a healthy attitude to religion, for me it was unlimiting, it was one religion covered all, i'd join clubs held by different religions and i loved the mix. I'm very much the same today, i'm a spiritualist as i believe and know we live on, death doesn't end us. But i freely accept each religions and love to learn more about many religions, the different gods in religions and culture in general. I'm all for a melting pot of people, backrounds and religions. What doesn't sit well with me is when a religion rules your life and changes you, so if God is love and basically an energy we all carry, religion is a man made organisation it can only be a human that puts the dogma there and it is a physical human being setting the rules and regulations that are thrust upon us. This for me, is where the confusion happens, its actually not God we go against, its the religious rules and regulations we go against. My thoughts have always varied on this but ultimately i always come back to God is love and kindness in ourselves and when we "fall out with God" or "God doesnt sit right with me" we're actually not liking parts of ourselves or our life isn't going how we think it should.
It used to make me cringe when i heard people say the word "God" back years ago when i'd "fell out" and went through a phase that God didn't exist, i'd still go to church but would keep my head up and eyes open, when someone said "let's bow our heads and pray" i'd have my phone inside a hymn book and play a game when it came to hymns or songs and i'd mouth blah, blah, blah or just move my mouth to make it look like i was singing. These were my acts of defiance against a God that i'd fell out with. When i look back at those times, i chuckle to myself and think i must have still believed in something to be in the church in the first place, and ive went to church all my life!
My Mom would have to take me as a child because i wanted to go, then a sunday school teacher would pick me up as i grew a little older until finally i was old enough to go along with different clubs i was in...The Girls Brigade, Brownies, Girl Guides. At church youth clubs i'd always be drawn to the people who were interested in the God side of things and we'd find we'd talk to those running the clubs about God etc. I'd attend a baptist church, pentecostal, united reformed, catholic, protestant, methodist, brethren (can't remember the denomination) and would take part in regular bible studies, scripture searches and once a week would go with a few friends,  to the home of one who would play guitar and his wife would sing and we'd all join in then enjoy pop and biscuits or cakes then chat about God, they were great times! One of my Sunday school teachers from my childhood, a lovely purely spiritual lady called Theresa, i visited her weekly until a few days before she passed in 2013, i'd help her in her home, i'd talk "god" and took my 2 children to visit her and she'd tell them bible stories, which they enjoyed and still remember her very fondly now. She hadn't believed in life eternal the way i do, but a week before she took ill, she told me she'd seen her beloved husband who was the pastor of the church and a lovely lovely man, she asked me if she had been dreaming but i'd assured her he was there to be with her through her illness and when the time came he would "take her home" this gave her great peace, and i was pleased she was happy to be reunited with her beloved Jimmy.
I enjoyed the coming together, the community spirit, even though i was a child and teenager but thats always carried forward with me, so GOD has always been in me which i do understand to be LOVE. 
I can also recognise i've always been a positive person but have had my times of negativity and when i look back on those, i recognise those are the times ive "fell out with God" basically fell out of love with myself, not liked myself. Instead of recognising that at the time i'd blame God, because i didn't want to take the blame myself! why would i! it wasn't my fault! In reality it was my thought process and understanding that God was an almighty being who watched and saw all, he would have seen the times i "did bad" or "sad bad things" or "wished bad to others" so of course he was going to fall out with me, BUT he couldn't if i fell out with him first!  
I'm not a "bible basher" nor a "religious freak" nor do i live my life by a religious rules or regulations, but i live my life as me, by me but with God by my side and within me, that is love. 
The universe is energy and a greater power, a cosmic power that has it's own universal laws which are natural laws, i prefer to live my life by natural laws and the universe.
So if it helps you to understand what God is and how you can build that relationship with God, think of love and letting love in, allow yourself to let love into your heart.
It genuinely gives you a lift and puts a smile on your heart.
So let God in and watch the changes for the better within and in your life. When you hear anyone say God bless, remember they are saying be blessed with love.
​God Bless


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What do your dreams tell you?

8/13/2020

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Dreams are mostly forgotten but have you noticed how many you remember?
They can be the most bizarre, peculiar sights and how many times do we just brush them to one side? 
I know unless a dream really stands out or "bothers" me enough to think about it over the day, i brush it off.  But imagine how much our dreams are telling us to help us? and just imagine if we look into those dreams and take the guidance, how much richer our lives could be?!
Over the years ive had very vivid dreams, the ones i've really looked into have done just that, helped me. For example, a few years ago i had a dream of being in a shopping mall , i was just shopping and minding my own business and a terrorist attack broke out, i carried on shopping while people were running and trying to hide but it stopped me from shopping. I started running trying to hide, under stairwells, behind doors etc my dream wasn't telling me there was going to be a terrorist attack, my dream was telling me i needed to have more confidence if i wanted to get to where i wanted to go. 

When in a dreamt state, your mind and body are at the most relaxed, it can be the time your loved ones and guides take the chance to connect with you. 
Because we are in a constant state of 'busy', our minds are on the go and often, many of us go to sleep with our minds still racing and we aren't aware of the 'stillness' but we may wake thinking 'that was a funny dream' or 'i remember a loved ones face in my dream' then we think no more about it.  If you were to think it through a little more, you would find it makes sense or you were visited.
Dreams happen when you are in REM sleep state, a very deep sleep when you are at your most relaxed and when you have the most vividest dreams. 
A very common dream is teeth, whether falling out, having a mouthful of loose teeth or at the dentist, teeth is a very prevalent dream when you look into it.
Next time you remember your dreams, keep a book by your bed to write them down or what stands out in your memory and then look into it. It can be something relating to your waking life. 
​Hope this helps make sense of yours 
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Discover your hearts desire

8/5/2020

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A quick tip to finding your hearts desire.
Our busy lives mean we lose sight on our life's purpose at times, this exercise helps to bring that back.

​​1 ~ Find a quiet space and sit as comfortable as possible, with your back straight, uncrossed legs and hands in your lap
2 ~ Set an intention to relax deeply, remembering everything that happens during the visualisation, to truly benefit from it
3 ~ Close your eyes and take a deep breath, in through your nose and out through your mouth. Take a total of seven breaths and with each exhale, imagine your going deeper and deeper into relaxation, becoming calmer as your thoughts slow
4 ~ Now imagine you're walking in a town centre, along a busy street. Imagine the shops and buildings as you pass by. Notice if it is daytime or night-time. Walk with a spring in your step and watch yourself as though you were watching another person. As you walk, people jostle you as they pass by. You come to a street corner, turn left and ahead of you is a huge advertising billboard
5 ~ Stop and read the billboard, it's promoting and acknowledging what is great about you. Does it show a picture of you with someone else? Have you won an award? Is it a book you have written? What does the text say? Set your intention to recall all your first thoughts about it
6 ~ Now take a deep breath and slowly bring yourself back into the present, breathing normally
7 ~ Take a few moments to write down what came to mind in your visualisation and reflect on any insights. 
​This is a great way to remind yourself about yourself!



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Bring love into your life

8/4/2020

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A few years ago after my husband had passed, i wasn't feeling in the best of places, i realised i had turned into someone i didn't like.
I'd had a lot of negativity around me, people, gossip, rumours and influences, the activity leading upto and surrounding Peter's passing had finally pulled me down and turned me into a person who just didn't like or love themselves. Everything i seemed to do turned to mush, felt everything was karma coming back to me, though my intention was pure (or so i thought, not realising i was carrying the negative energies i had soaked up) I, like many, thought i needed love to make me feel "whole" or "better". 
I was talking to a friend who is a white witch and asked her about spells or anything that could help bring love into my life. She told me a couple of ways, reciting daily affirmations (i didn't try it then, as i wanted FAST results!) and setting an altar, which i thought was a bit much or a bit too witchy but thought i'll try it...it worked in a way i definately didn't see coming! 
It worked for me so i KNOW it CAN work for you!


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Why do we cry?

4/30/2020

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Lately i've been thinking about crying, why do we cry? what is the difference in tears of laughter and tears of sadness? what does crying do for us? where do the tears come from? I've meditated on this and thought about this and came back to the same answer...crying is a release of emotions.
Grieving for a loved one causes us to hold emotions in, we try to be strong for others and ourselves. We still feel the need to emotionally collapse but usually we don't give in to it as much as we should.
Crying with grief is a release of the love we have inside for the person we lost. It can be a deep racking sobbing, coupled with a feeling of helplessness and a feeling of emptiness and its a natural process. To some it can release the feelings we have of, have we done enough, what if, if only...as we cry we're letting these feeling go, for some it takes time for others it can be a quick process. But it's a natural emotion. Sometimes it you can actually feel the release, as a lighter feeling grows in your chest or as a weight leaves you. This can happen if you've realised the loved one has had enough, it's best for them or you have accepted the ineviteable. It's the ones left behind who feel the loss most.
Crying over a relationship, is like a grief, its mourning a loss, an ending. It all depends on how much love was there at the time of the end or break up, some people know when it's over but sometimes stay in that relationship a little bit longer. When that happens you might find there's very few tears if any. Some feel a sense of relief even. Sometimes when a relationship is over, you might not be crying for that person, it could be the extended relationships which have built, the bonds and the ties that you feel you lose.
Crying in pain or when we hurt ourselves is really to soothe ourselves, feeling sorry for ourselves, and you'll find as the pain of hurting ourselves goes, so does the crying. 
Emotional crying for seemingly no reason can happen when we feel out of balance, losing control, out of sync with life in general, and sometimes can have a domino effect, we look for the reasons why, we look to sometimes blame other things and sometimes it can be situations or others that can cause this crying, its the cause and effect reaction. 
So crying in general when it's to do with any kind of pain, whether a loss, an ending or actual pain is for soothing ourselves emotionally. And emotions are all from within. Hopelessness, abondonment, loneliness can all be rolled together. It's our body's own natural painkiller

Crying with joy or happiness can happen out of the blue too, if we've really looked forward to an event, meeting someone we havn't seen for sometime, can cause feelings of excitement and it can be overwhelming and we cry. We cry at jokes when we laugh. If you think, when we go through bouts of crying with sadness, there's almost always something that will pick us up and make us smile or laugh and there'll be a tear or two that come with that. We can be sad or feeling tearful and someone will say "cheer up" or try in their way to make us laugh or at least smile. This is a form of "cleansing" a carthartic or purging of the emotions.
Crying is good for us as it cleanses the emotions. If you have had a bad day, emotionally and feel stressed, a good cry at the end of the day is one of the ways the body cleanses and purges itself to pick itself and emotions up again.

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The veil is lifting...

4/19/2020

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Talking to friends recently, i was asked if i thought the veil between the worlds was becoming thin? 
Without hesitation my answer was and is YES.  Those from the spirit side of life, family and friends are always around without a shadow of doubt, but we're seeing more evidence of them. They're becoming more daring and i'll explain how and why.
More people are coming together to support each other, help each other stay positive. There's more healing thoughts being sent out as we all go through this time together wishing everyone well, showing concern for each other. People are becoming more open minded as they think of different ways to entertain themselves. Families are spending more time together, there's bonding going on and that sense of coming together in all ways is there. Ways that we maybe hadn't thought of, listening to suggestions and possibilties from others. 
"The community spirit" is building, the thinking of each other sometimes more than ourselves. 

Those we love on the spirit side of life, feel the need in the world. The worries, the fear, the thoughts of "will i get through this" and they show support by being around us more, which is why they are getting a little bit more daring in their signs and communications.
There is and always will be a minority of people who think of their needs first, or frown on others for ingenuity , but unfortunately they remain closed minded to not everything, but some possiblities. ​
Over the last few weeks i'm hearing people say they have seen their loved ones almost in solid form, had signs in the strangest of ways, heard their voices talking to them and even been caught on video.
For spirit to to be seen in this way the conditions must be right, the balance must be right, and at the moment the balance seems to be coming back as people are showing love and support to each other.
Becoming spiritually aware doesn't always mean aware of spirit, but inner Godliness, compassion for others, love and support towards our fellow man, helping each other. People are realising that showing compassion towards others brings an inner happiness, an inner glow that is feeding your soul. Yes we all have our material needs, but the inner happiness with ourselves and that joyful feeling we feel when we've done a "good deed" is what ultimately feeds our soul and keeps our spirits uplifted. 
This is what the world has been missing, and hopefully it will be a part of the "new normal" more love, more support and more compassion. 

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Time to love yourself

3/3/2020

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Loving yourself is more than nice clothes and hair, yes of course it's about presentation on the outside but there's also loving yourself from the inside.
When you love yourself from within it shines on the outside. The saying "how can you love someone else, if you don't know how to love yourself first" makes sense. 
 Loving yourself can build your self esteem and give you what i call a "quiet confidence" . It can be the smallest word that's been said to you that's stuck with you, children who have been told they're stupid, worthless or worse can grow up believing it to be true, and because it's an adult that has usually told them they believe it's validated.
Loving yourself can build your self esteem and give you what i call a "quiet confidence"
It can be the smallest word that's been said to you that's stuck with you, children who have been told they're stupid, worthless or worse can grow up believing it to be true, and because it's an adult that has usually told them they believe it's validated. As adults we can also believe words that's said by others, or we see someone who we deem to be better than us, due to looks or accomplishments and we judge ourselves. ​
Imagine being a child or adult and not having those words said to you? Imagine ignoring those words and how confident you would be feeling now?  
Society has changed over the years, where we all know or have heard the benefits of being positive, giving positive affirmations and not validating the negative. I believe we are going through a phase of change in the world, which has been creeping up over quite a few years with a few more to go. I myself, made a conscious decision when i had my children that i would only give positive affirmations and not fall into the negative judgements. So when they would have, for example, spelling tests at school, and maybe the mark would be 8/10 or 9/10 and they would say "ah i only got this mark or that mark", i'd always tell them well it's left you room to improve your mark next time, or "it's better than less" but i'd always tell them they can only try their best and the important thing is the trying. If you don't try you will never know. If they ever say their stupid, i tell them "no you're not, you just havn't used your brain but you'll know better next time" I've carried out the positive affirmations throughout their life and they both have a "quiet confidence" about them that always surprises me. 
Self confidence is a daily affirmation of "you can do this" "you are better than you think" " you got this" and more. 
Daily affirmations of self love can be looking in the mirror once a day and, even in your mind telling yourself your a good person, you look lovely, you deserve success etc they really can change your outlook on yourself as the inner self in acknowledged and validated.
Here are a few ways you can show yourself love.
  1. TUNE IN TO YOURSELF - ​Sit with your back straight, close your eyes and place your left hand over your heart, relax your shoulders and arms and allow your belly to soften​. Take 3 slow deep breaths, breathe in for a count of 4 and out for a count of 4, as you bring your attention to your heart, notice any physical or emotional sensations.
  2. WAKE UP TO WONDERFUL - Each new day gives you the opportunity of which side of the bed to get out of. The positive way is to start the day with gratitude. Say aloud (or in your mind if you're not comfortable out loud) "I'm so grateful for my comfy bed, i'm grateful for my sheets/duvet and pillows, i'm grateful for daylight and i'm grateful i woke up today!"
  3. CREATE A SACRED PEACEFUL PLACE - Creating a sacred, peaceful space in your home makes you more receptive to subtle energies, giving you room to be with your inner thoughts and emotions. First physically clean and clear your space, then energetically clear the space. Open a window to allow the old energy to leave, then smudge with a sage stick or burn an incense stick or nub to cleanse and purify (I use and recommend nag champa, dragons blood, sandalwood) you could then burn a palo santo incense stick, wafting it around to bring in peace and joy. Ideally working up to decluttering your home, room by room. Clearing out items, clothes, ornaments etc anything of no further use or what you havn't worn. Donating to a local charity shop is ideal. 
  4. FACE YOUR FEARS - Sit quietly and call your fear upto the surface, this could be visualised or just thinking about it. When you know what your fear is, choose to experience it fully, howl cry, sob, whimper  or whatever sound needs to come out. Ask your inner child what they need, once you know, give them it. Allow your body to open to recieving your own love.
​​​You'll find yourself happier, enjoying your life and finding joy within. Life is about experiences good and bad, but with confidence and esteem knowing your own worth will enable you to bring more of the good while feeling better about yourself.
I truly hope some of these techniques work for you. 
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    Elaine has a working class backround, and understands the trials of life. Here she shares some of her thoughts on many different topics

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